Thoughtful Thursday: Cleavage

December 1, 2011

Thoughtful Thursday

Welcome to the December Intelligentsia, the people who have commented on every Thoughtful Thursday post in November (not as hard this month, since I only managed two Thoughtful Thursday posts).

#26: Elana from Elana’s Musings
#18: Strongblonde from Strong Blonde
#15: Ernessa from Fierce and Nerdy
#10: Tara from Turkey In My Oven
#9: Ana
#8: St. Elsewhere
#7: Lori Lavender Luz from Write Mind Open Heart

and new member Sara!

Thoughtful ThursdayI just spent several hundred dollars on new bras. I’ve had the same bra size all of my adult life (38F), but I was near a top-notch bra store and thought I’d get fitted. I don’t know if it’s because of pregnancy and nursing or because my past fittings have been good but not great, but the size at which they measured me was pretty different: 34G-H.

Unlike most shops, which have slim pickings in my size, this shop had piles. Once the clerk had fitted me, she literally brought in everything in my size, and then I worked my way through about 30 bras.

Among the selections were a couple that I’d never encountered in my size: deep cleavage bras. I don’t ever wear anything that would require such a low-cut bra — with a chest like mine, at least at my age, showing a lot of cleavage would be overkill — but even so, it was pretty fun to try them on.

Burrito seems to have even more conservative views. Both he and Tamale rarely have opinions on others’ clothing, good or bad (though they are huge fans of DH’s bear sweatshirt), but Burrito has very strong opinions about my shirts. Normally I wear crewnecks or high v-necks, but every time I wear a lower v-neck or scoop-neck, he freaks out. He starts patting my exposed chest frantically and chatters in a very concerned way, “mama shirt mama chest mama shirt!”

What’s your stance on cleavage?

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17 Responses to “Thoughtful Thursday: Cleavage”

  1. St. Elsewhere Says:

    Burrito does that?

    He is funny!

    I don’t think I have any deep cleavage bras. And I am more concerned with comfort rather than the design part of the bras I buy.

    I have been 36 B for a long time, but over the years, I have realized that the way the cup is shaped does change how snugly it fits me.

    So I kind of watch out for that.

    I am also not very lingerie-crazy. I just buy them in a few sets, so that I don’t have to go buy new ones for atleast a year and I can phase out any stuff I am no longer interested in using.

    Once I found a brand that was good enough for day-long wear for me (Lovable), I buy only that.

    I have not ever visited a shop like the kind you visited (the bra store).

    I did buy new bras for me a month back (same size), but I have chosen ones that have s slim strap, and a slimmer support band at the back.

    I buy bras a bit just like I buy footwear.

  2. a Says:

    I used to be happy to have any cleavage! Not that I ever show it. My husband liked to point out when my v-neck shirts were giving an unintentional show. Now I hardly ever wear v-necks…unless I have another shirt underneath.

  3. celia Says:

    Mine are not what they used to be. I have no clue what I will be dealing with once I am done breastfeeding our second son. Currently I am a 42 D. Up from a pre-Peter size of 36 C. We are getting them fixed when I turn 40, because breastfeeding was not kind to them. Or perhaps the fact that I was so exhausted from breastfeeding that I lived in either no bra or a sleep bra for over a year has something to do with it. Either way, they are getting hiked back up.

  4. Ana Says:

    That is funny about Burrito. My toddler never seemed to notice my chest until I started BF-ing the baby in front of him, now he pokes at my boob and makes a disgusted face “baby eat this”.

    I was always on the moderate side (vacillating between B & C based on how much I was exercising, and I’m overall pretty small) and quite liked showing a bit of cleavage in my younger perkier days. Pregnancy jacked them up to an E, and now a D while breastfeeding. A lot of the clothes I wear these days that are nursing-friendly are also pretty cleavage-y, and I’m not really into that anymore. With my changing body during/after pregnancy I find it hard to dress & look professional, and the boobs busting out aren’t helping! Not sure what they’ll look like after breastfeeding my second; after the first they shrunk to smaller than ever and not quite as perky.

  5. Two Kayaks Says:

    I’m a 36B and just had a fitting last month. I’m all about coverage and hiding any trace of cleavage. I’ve never been comfortable having breasts. I’m not thrilled about how noticeable the girls are and I wish they would be invisible. I think I may be in the minority. I wish I was back to the AA cup I used to be.


  6. I’m still wearing nursing bras. The only nursing bra that worked for me was Bravado’s Bodysilk Seamless bra. It comes in xs-xl, so I have no idea what size I am currently. I used to be a 38C. I don’t necessarily try to show cleavage, but I do wear v-neck shirts a lot, just because it was easier to nurse that way. Birdie usually only nurses at night now, but it is just easier if I wear a nursing friendly shirt in case she wants to nurse at naptime. If this surprise pregnancy sticks, I will be staying in the nursing bras for another couple of years. Who knows what things will look like then!

    Birdie loves to pat my chest and often just touches her palm to my chest to soothe herself. Since it is cold now, I have been wearing sweatshirts in the house lately, and she will frequently come over to me and unzip my sweatshirt in order to lay her head down on my chest for a moment. It is very sweet.

  7. Cat Says:

    I’m a 36F and am far more concerned with support than cleavage. Maybe if I didn’t have it I would want it, but I don’t even wear clothes that would show it off anyway. I would happily sign up for a reduction if there was money available for something so frivolous (given that there’s no medical need).

    Would you mind sharing the name of the shop, if it won’t give away your secret location?


  8. I think there is appropriate cleavage and inappropriate cleavage, just as there are time to show off a bit and times you really shouldn’t.

    For myself, I good fitting bra means I’m comfortable and clothes sit properly on me. Many tops are made for those with far more then I have so I’m very aware of what does and doesn’t look good.

    I was one of those that gained a little bit in size when I was pregnant, but I stopped nursing after 3.5 agonizing weeks and everything went back to normal. So I can shop pretty much anywhere, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have to try on 5 or more bras to see what actually fits right.


  9. Jeez… I should have been able to manage two posts to be part of the November Intelligentsia… Oh well.

    I don’t think I really have a stance on cleavage. It can be nice sometimes, but with everyday clothing I must admit that there’s not much cleavage showing (and if there is, my son is sure to pull at my bra and ask “‘c’est quoi ça?”). But if I dress up I don’t mind showing a little bit of cleavage. But I will never wear something where you’d have the feeling my boobs will fall out any moment and I’d have a “wardrobe malfunction”.

    I did however just very recently order a fancy nursing bra online (let my hubby pick it out), because I do feel that we’re allowed to feel a little sexy (even if we’re not showing it), especially just after giving birth.

  10. Sara Says:

    My current stance is distaste in many respects. I’m currently swapping between two nursing bras — 70C and 75B whereas what I think I really need is a 75C but there wasn’t one available when my mom went out on my behalf — she went because I don’t think there’s any way I could attempt bra shopping at this point! Add to this one breast with a blocked duct and another which my daughter nommed on pretty badly over a week ago and still hasn’t healed, and neither one of which will she nurse on, I’m pretty sick of the whole idea of boobs at the moment.

  11. strongblonde Says:

    hahahahaha! we must be on the same wavelength with bras! my entire adult life i was wearing a 34 B or C. then i got forced into bra shopping wtih a pregnant friend just after i had found out about my molar pregnancy and was still undergoing testing for the cancer. at any rate, she got sized and was trying on bras while i got sized. the lady told me i was a 38 A or B. i really wanted to punch her in the face. i took one of the bras she gave me and threw it on the floor and walked outside. i am still shocked that i behaved that way. a month or so later i got resized as a 36D. since then i’ve been sized as a million different things. my guess is that it is really subjective.

    and i’m a total dummy about bras, as you already know.

    BUT, i digress. cleavage? i used to wear whatever i wanted and not really think about it, but now i refer to stuff as “boob-a-licious” or normal. lol. yesterday i wore a boobalicious shirt, but wore a sweater over it and pulled at it all day since I was uncomfortable with it. T has a habit of putting his hands down people’s shirts when they’re holding them. male or female. doesn’t matter. 🙂

    i think that breastfeeding changed my views about cleavage in general. or maybe just mine since everything seems much softer/limp “down there” 🙂


  12. You’re talking to someone who reallllly has to squeeze out any cleavage.

    But when I do manage to show any, both of my children give me appreciative looks. As does my husband.

    So funny about Burrito!

  13. celia Says:

    Oh right,cleaving. I forgot. A lot of my maternity shirts seem to also be HEY LOOK AT MAH BOOBS shirts. My son is much more interested in them now, and he has not nursed in seven months. He touches them and I tell him they are making milk for our new baby just like they made milk for him but that now he is a big boy and has a big boy cup. I don’t know what he’ll do when the baby is actually nursing. Guess I’ll see.

  14. Rebecca Says:

    I have to be careful for work because I work with ‘laddy’ men who often stand at my desk while I’m sitting down. I’ve actually started wearing a tank top under some tops.


  15. Oh, I likesy the cleavage and now that I’ve lost the baby weight, that’s what I miss the most. The other day I broke down and went back to the serious Vicky’s push-ups with a forlorn sigh. Farewell, dear natural cleavage. I loved you so! I still wear V-necks, though. It makes me feel like the Jersey mom when I drop my daughter off at preschool, but I’m also happy that I’ve kept some sexy for myself.

  16. Tara (TIMO) Says:

    Not a cleavage lover. I tend to buy clothes with crew cut tops or high V-necks. Many of my dresses have low backs and high fronts.

    I really need to go get a proper fitting. I haven’t had one since buying a strapless bra for senior prom. I usually just buy whatever Target has in my size, which I know isn’t right anymore. Pregnancy made my band size bigger and I think my cup size is smaller. I just tried on one of my “sexier” (lace not just cotton) bras to wear with a dress for Nav’s Holiday Party and it didn’t fit so I went with a different dress instead of buying a new bra.

  17. Elana Kahn Says:

    I have enough boobs to go around that I don’t need to push them up to create cleavage. That said, because of my religious beliefs I only wear tops that have a high neckline (think like a t-shirt), so you can see how big my boobs are but no actual cleavage. I think women should save that kind of thing for their husbands. I feel like it’s someone showing their butt crack out in public.


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