Perfect Moment Monday: Trying It On For Size

February 22, 2010

Perfect Moment

This week I tried something on for size a couple of times.

No, not my old jeans. I can’t even pull those up, much less button them.

I tried being honest about infertility.

Babysitter: Do twins run in your family?
Me: Not really, we had twins as a result of fertility treatments.
Babysitter: Oh, okay. I was asking because my mom is a twin, and my sister always says that she thinks we’ll both have twins.

It turns out the “do twins run in the family?” question sometimes has a non-nosy motivation.

Colleague who came over to meet the babies and bring us a casserole: Did you know that you might have twins? Do you have a family history? Were you shocked?
Me: They were the result of fertility treatments.
Colleague: Oh, so you were just glad it wasn’t three or four or more!
Me: Actually yes.

I outed myself and the world didn’t end. In fact, every time I have done so, it has gone rather well.

Still not ready to go as far as telling our families, but I could get used to this honesty thing.

Find more Perfect Moments at Weebles Wobblog.


15 Responses to “Perfect Moment Monday: Trying It On For Size”

  1. I can’t see many people having a strong negative reaction to the news. I cannot believe that there are people who have not been touched by IF one way or another. My mom struggled for 7 years. My brother and his wife struggled for at least that long. My cousin and his wife battled for 10+ years. That is why the insensitive ones piss me off. I’d bet $1,000 someone they know has dealt with IF and they still make snide remarks.

  2. Ana Says:

    Good for you! (and lol about the jeans…I actually stupidly started trying on my old clothes yesterday, to see what I needed to buy before starting work. it was scary. on a positive note, I will have a whole new wardrobe this spring)

  3. Lavender Luz Says:

    I can almost feel the weight lift off as you talk about telling people, and the sky doesn’t fall.

    Now about the weight and jeans…

    I think GeekbyMarriage has a great point, as well, that IF touches nearly everyone by some degree or other.

  4. Kristin Says:

    I’m so glad it is going well.

  5. strongblonde Says:

    lol. i love that you say you could get used to the honesty thing. we actually DO have twins in my family. my paternal grandfather was an identical twin and my mother’s sisters are fraternal twins. so….when i get that question i answer honestly, but still feel slightly dishonest about it. lol.

    and don’t get me started about jeans. i have one pair that “fits” and the rest are a joke. …maybe that’s why people end up in “mommy jeans”??

  6. Wishing4One Says:

    I think its great that you are telling casually the way your twins came about. Would it be rude/nosey/prying to ask why not your families? It may have been on your blog and I missed it. Anyway good for you girl!

  7. Dora Says:

    That’s great! I agree with Lori, you do sound lighter as you talk about telling people. Also, I think the more it’s talked about, the more it will seem “normal.” Which, IMO, is better for our children.

    As for the jeans, I haven’t wanted to try on old pants. I just went and got new ones (on sale). (Particularly like the Levis with tummy control.) While I’m not happy about the number on the label, they do fit, and it feels good to be out of maternity pants.

  8. Kate Says:

    I’ve told lots of people about the 2 losses and 4 years of struggling to get pg and the 2 rounds of IVF to get here. Haven’t had a bad reaction yet. I doubt DH has told anyone, but I’m pretty open about things. You never know when someone will say that they suffer from IF too and ask for support/advice.

  9. Sheri Says:

    I’m visiting from Lori’s Weebles Wobblog Perfect Moment Monday post…

    I think the “honesty” thing is fitting you perfectly.

    I’ve been struggling with the same “truthful” issue in telling people that I am intuitive (and sometimes even that I read tarot cards). But the more I’m just ME, the easier everything seems to be. And most of the “negative reaction” I expect is all in my head.

    I guess as an Intuitive, I should have known this…right? ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thanks for sharing your Perfect Moment!

  10. Eva Says:

    Having difficulty to “make” children and then overcoming those obstacles with help of whatever way is not something to be embarassed about I believe. Even if some people make snide remarks.

    Maybe it took me and my husband only months during the TTC part, but nothertheless several years to convince him to let children in his live at all. That process can hurt very much, too. And you can even less talk about that.

    And I believe that two parents so sure about this goal that they want to raise children and do everything for them – this is something to be proud about!! More along the way: “We tried everything for them – and it worked! – and even twins!!!”

  11. Photogrl Says:

    When we first found out we were expecting twins, the first thing I worried about was how to dodge the “Do they run in your family?” question.

    You give me hope that I can try “honesty” on for size. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  12. Heather Says:

    Wonderful! The only time I’m not honest is at church. We’re Catholic, so they frown on IF treatments. My statement when people ask the “If twins run in the family?” question is “Not really, but it’s more common for older moms.” Most people think I’m a lot younger than I look and don’t realize I’m almost 40. When I was pregnant with Phoebe 9 years ago, I was almost 30, but I used to get random people telling me how horrible it was that I was a pregnant teenager! I was so shocked!

  13. heather Says:

    yay for “out” babay steps!

  14. Kami Says:

    Good for you! I have always been a proponent of honesty. I don’t think we can change the perception of infertility if we aren’t honest about our experiences.

    Congrats on becoming a mom!

  15. When I was pregnant my husband and I started responding to the question of whether twins run in our family by saying: “they do now!” We said it in a friendly way, and people seemed to take it well. It was an easy way to imply we’d had help, without getting into it. I am fine letting people know that we had IVF, but it can make people uncomfortable.

    Yesterday on the street I was stopped by a grandma of twins who assumed that because I have boy/girl twins I just have double eggs in my family. (her daughter-in-law does, or at least that is what her son and daughter-in-law told her!)

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