Perfect Moment Monday: What’s in a Name?

January 26, 2009

I’ve mentioned before that we’ve had boy and girl baby names picked out for years. Both are fairly unusual — one hasn’t been in the top 500 most popular baby names since before I was born, and the other has never cracked the top 500. I’ve never known anybody with either name. But both are reasonably spelled, easily pronounceable, and not unfamiliar to the ear. My real name violates all of those principles, and DH’s name violates most of them; we have chosen not to subject our future children to the same inconveniences. We’re going with distinctive but not esoteric… we still have enough work to do, correcting the spellings and pronunciations of our own names every day. (Note: One of our names shouldn’t be hard to pronounce, but people are dumb.)

This weekend, I found it a bit unnerving when I started watching a new TV show and one of the main characters had one of the names. Not only that, but people specifically use the character’s name every few sentences. My first reaction was that I don’t want to keep watching and hear my beloved name over and over (“that’s my baby’s name, don’t wear it out”). The show isn’t good enough for me to deal with my ears pricking up 50 times per episode.

Then I thought to check for other TV characters with that name. According to my old friend IMDB, between first and last names, that name has appeared in well over 1000 movies or episodes of TV shows — including a character on one of my all-time favorite TV shows (but I’d forgotten because that character was almost always called by his last name instead of my baby name). It would appear that I’ve come across the name hundreds of times, and my ears didn’t prick up — or at least, not enough for me to register it and remember. So maybe it’s not such a big deal after all.

I still haven’t decided whether to keep watching this new show, but I will make the decision on the basis of the show’s merits, not my unfulfilled infertile fantasies.

This is an instance of refusing to let myself get bogged down by infertility, and I think that qualifies as growth.

Perfect MomentWeebles Wobblog is all about personal growth, as well as Perfect Moments.


15 Responses to “Perfect Moment Monday: What’s in a Name?”

  1. I figured it out: “Remington Steele”

    Oh, scratch that. You said it’s a NEW show.

    “(that’s my baby’s name, don’t wear it out)” — snicker. I completely get this sentiment.

  2. luna Says:

    names are one of those things we’ve never shared with ANYone. don’;t intend to either. but yeah, I was pretty disturbed when one of ours started popping up in people magazine. one even had our spelling.

  3. MrsJoyner Says:

    I completely agree. We have a boy name and a girl name picked out and just recently, a B-list celebrity named one of her girls our first name. Im so peeved. How dare she not consult me first. I know, crazy. But I still love the name and haven’t shared it with anyone. It kind of makes me not want it anymore, even though I love it. Ugh, I understand your pain. And it’s good to have names picked means you see light at the end of the TTC tunnel..I think.

  4. Brenna Says:

    Oh, I can really relate to this too! Unfortunately our name just appeared at our support group for parents who’ve lost children. Yep. I’ve never heard it used before by ANYONE, and as we went around the table introducing ourselves, a new couple mentioned that they lost their daughter [insert the name my husband and I have wanted to use for the past three years!] over the holidays. Now I hear the name many times a day via an e-mail list from the support group, and I’m actually contemplating leaving the list/group. I just can’t handle having this name that we’ve loved for so many years used repeatedly in connection with this sweet, adorable little baby who died in the NICU. I feel like a terrible person for saying that–but I’m already imaging how her parents would feel if DH and I do manage to have a daughter some day and we decide to use the name. I’m sure they’ll feel as though we took it from them. 😦

  5. April Says:

    funny…i am always afraid that i will pick a name and then not like it when i actually have a kid. i think that teaching does that to you…every name you associate with a prior student 😦

  6. Kischa Says:

    I guess I’m unique in the since that I have no names picked out for either a boy or girl.

    I think I need to get on it – you’d think after 3 years of TTC I would have come up with something by now.

  7. patiencesong Says:

    I have always been obsessed with baby names and had names picked out for my future children starting when i was about 10 years old. (For the record, I would like to say that I picked Aidan long before Sex & the City and whatever else made it the name of the year. I still love love love the name, but it’s not at the top of my list anymore as I tend to veer away from “of the moment” names.

    Before our first IVF, LG and I had countless conversations about what we would name the baby(babies if twins). Those conversations have been few and far between this go-around.

    Congrats on deciding whether to watch the show on its merits. I know all too well how easy it is to let infertility influence all factors of my life – big and small. (I finally went out to buy new pants a few weekends ago…I’d been putting it off forever “…in case I got pregnant.”) Thanks for sharing your perfect moment with us!

  8. fattykins Says:

    Okay, now I reaaaalllly want to know what the name is. I find myself trying to guess what show it is. I can only think of one new show…is it Lie to me? Oh man now I really want to know! But, I am nosey like that.

  9. Bunny Says:

    i love playing with names…on long car rides one game i like to play is let’s think of all the A names we like, then B names, and so on. Like April, I’ve had some names “ruined” because of students in my class.

    ultimately, your name is your name, tv show or not.

    good luck with your appointment tomorrow!!!

  10. Delenn Says:

    I specifically picked my daughter’s name from a t.v. character (although it is not a popular name either and is rather unique). But I also know of the “everyone has that name” category, as my son is a very common name…I had no say on that one, as he was named in memory of my husband’s father.

    Whatever name you give them, though–they always become that name. I cannot think of any other “Michael” other than my son…and I cannot think of any other name that would suit him.

  11. daega99 Says:

    In the beginning I wrote down names that I thought were interesting but we never made any decisions on them. I won’t even look at the notebook now – like I’d jinx myself or something. Still, when I hear some of the names on TV, it literally makes my ears perk up.

    *ICLW 66*

  12. littlesteps Says:

    I totally understand the sentiment. The last two babies born in our families both have used names that I liked – one boy and one girl. The boy’s name is fairly common and popular now, but the girl’s is not. I’ve never known anyone by that name, except for on the TV show where I got it from. DH didn’t really like that name anyway, but it still seems unfair someone taking “my” name before we get a chance to use it.

  13. What’s funny is we had our names all picked out, but when we actually found out the sex, we changed our minds. Our name is very common, but old-fashioned.

    Keep an eye on that celebrity, though. Supposedly we’re dealing with so many “Austin”s now b/c a soap opera character was named Austin, and it led to a boom.

  14. Leslie Laine Says:

    Yes, it certainly does qualify as growth.

    The other day, my husband and I received a belated Christmas card from an old friend – you know, one of those card/pix of all three of his beautiful, healthy children (one of the many reasons I’m relieved when the Holiday season is over – I get sooo tired of seeing the passage of time in photo after photo after photo like this).

    Anyway, his last child was born a few months ago and had my baby name. I was crushed.

    My husband looked at me and said that there is no reason that can’t still be our name. If it’s our name, it’s our name, and it doesn’t matter what other people do in the meantime.

    So, it’s still my secret baby name, and I think that after all we’ve gone through to get to that point, we should be able to name our child anything we damn well please.

    Glad you’re sticking to your guns.

  15. Ha, the same thing happened to me recently with our No.1 boy name (well its number 1 and 2 now!!) – and its a new Jason whats-his-face movie. I saw the trailer and shrieked “Nooooooooooooooooo!! They can’t use that name, now everyone will think I got the idea from this movie!!” (Or even worse, from the actor – not that he’s bad. but I like thought to go into a name. and its one of the few non-Indian names on the list).

    Hmmm. Now its no.2. If I like the movie, I’ll keep it on the list. If not, its gone!

    I’m so curious about your baby name though. I don’t really watch TV so I couldn’t take a guess.

    I’m glad you’re keeping the name on your list though!

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